So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
