He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Randomize