Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Randomize
