We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
