It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
She made me pour olive oil on her.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Randomize