no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
