I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
