i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
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