There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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