So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
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