I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
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