she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
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