Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
