Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
