I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
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