If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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