The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
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