summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
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