I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize