I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
