that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
