i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
