how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize