Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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