Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
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