well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Randomize
