my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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