Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
