Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize