He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize