She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
