It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Swine flu. Run for my life!
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Watching her eat just hurts me
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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