I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
