Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Randomize
