Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
Randomize