A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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