Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
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