I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize