Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
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