I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
