Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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