Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Two ladies just showed up with my fucking purse. It was in the fucking street. I'm a train wreck. As a financial advisor, this shouldn't happen. I should be an adult.
I have bruises all over my body. Seriously, I'm a train wreck. I'm too damn old for hangovers like this.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
