sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize
