We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
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