I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
