I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Randomize
