chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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