Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Randomize
