Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
