I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
