My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Randomize
