naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
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