in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Randomize
